A few weeks back we had our anatomy ultrasound appointment. It’s been one of those appointments that I think I’ve been excited for and nervous about all in the same breath. When I arrived at the appointment I had nervous butterflies and waiting for forty minutes didn’t help. The ultrasound tech called me back and we started the ultrasound. He started scanning, and freezing pictures, and measuring -this little girl is quite the mover already. And then I saw this weird bubble-looking-thing near the umbilical cord. I asked the ultrasound tech what it was and of course he wasn’t allowed to tell me, which didn’t give me any confidence. He then went and tracked the blood flow of the umbilical cord which looked good and it didn’t look like there were any problems.
Long story short, we were sent outside to wait for the results and then got called back in to talk to my doctor (routine at every appointment so far). She said that our baby is growing healthy and strong and everything looks good, the only small thing they found was a “cyst” on the umbilical cord. I was shocked and scared all in one moment. She said that it’s not a big deal, she has seen it before, and that she wasn’t worried about it, but that just to get a second opinion she wanted to send me to a specialist.
Brand’s sister is in sonography school and because Brand wasn’t able to go with me to the appointment earlier that day we headed to her school that afternoon so he could take a look for him self. I was again reassured by her teacher that there wasn’t anything to worry about and honestly, having Brand see it and the worry leave his face gave me a boost of hope. (When I saw the ultrasound again the “cyst” looked more like a bubble and was more near the top of the umbilical cord on the placenta wall.)
I’ll admit, after the first ultrasound I kinda had a break down. All these horrible thoughts went through my mind: what if my baby wasn’t going to be okay and what if we were going to loose her? I couldn’t imagine either thought. I wanted her to be okay. I’ve been wanting this little one for oh-so-long, I couldn’t imagine her being taken away from me so soon.
I remember all the pain and sadness not having a baby made me feel, but then I remembered how I got through it all. I trusted in the Lord. That His will would be done, and that everything would work out. Since the appointment I’ve felt these little kicks, and punches, and all the movement that goes on in there, I’m so blessed to have this beautiful gift, to be able to be a mom. Something I’ve only wanted for my whole entire life. I love this little baby so much already, I can’t imagine what it’s going to be like when she gets here!
And now I patiently wait for my appointment with the specialist… which is today… three weeks later.