Thursday, February 19, 2015

one month




I've never had such a wonderful month. I feel like I say this all the time, but I love being a mom,  Sure it's tiring, sometimes stressful, but it's the most rewarding job I've ever had. Each day I'm more grateful than the last.

At one month old Hazel:

Can hold her head up when she sits.

Likes it best when she is sitting up so she can see everything that is going on.

Sleeps 4-5 hours a night.

Loves to smile at people who smile at her.

Loves her mom and dad's voices and looks in their direction when she hears them.

Only takes naps during the day when she is being held. 

Follows mom and dad with her eyes.

Loves looking at lights, fans, and things that are black and white.

Loves to be warm when she sleeps.

Loves getting kisses from mom and dad.



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Saturday, February 14, 2015

Thursday, February 12, 2015

three weeks old

bow: the striped arrow, socks: me

Welp, week three since this little lady was born and again I say how quick time is going by. Maybe all of us moms should get together and try and freeze time, it might just work if we all try really hard. 

This week Hazel has started holding her head up so much more, she likes to move her head so much - she did in the first two weeks also, but she is getting so much stronger. 

I don't know if my hair is just getting in the way more or what, but she loves to hold onto my hair.  It could be a sign that I need a hair cut or it could be that she just likes to hold onto things. 

Earlier this week I was feeding Hazel and she started feeling her head with her hand, she seems like she is sure getting used to this cute little body she has. 

Some nights Hazel doesn't sleep very good, and earlier this week I found out that she really likes to sleep on her side. She doesn't seem to fuss as much when she is laying like this, so we are crossing our fingers that we've made a break through in sleeping time! 

Each week I think about how much I love this little girl and I think about how I thought I loved her so much the week before, but boy, my love for her grows even more each week. 


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I could have never done it alone


I keep thinking back on the 17 hours I was in labor, thinking about everything that happened because I don't want to forget a single moment. The one thing -and really the first thing- that comes to mind is how I could never have done any of it without Brand. I needed him so much and am so grateful he was there for me.
I feel like the moment we got to labor and delivery he went into supportive husband mode. He was there by my side the whole time -except for the 45 minutes after we were just hanging out doing nothing and he went to get us something to eat.
He was such an amazing coach, the entire time he was always so positive, helpful, and upbeat. He was there to hold my hand when I was having the worst contractions -we used our Lamaze class breathing rule lots, thank heavens for Lamaze class.  He was there to distract me when I was getting my IV catheter -we talked about pictures on instagram and text messages we got from family, he's such a good distract-er. He was there holding my hand when I got my epidural -the thing I was most scared about. He was there when we were just moments away from seeing our little girl for the first time.

And I'm constantly thinking about how much he was there for me because I know he is always going to be there for her. My favorite moments seem to be when Brand interacts with Hazel. Trying to capture these moments in picture is only one thing you can do because the pictures only show that exact moment.  But knowing the stories behind the pictures, like right after we took this picture Hazel gave us the biggest smile, but we were too busy enjoying it to get it on camera. I love these times. 

Boy are we lucky to have Brand -more than I'll ever know.  


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Monday, February 09, 2015

a condensed version of my weekend

I'm definitely getting my days mixed up, I just thought this was our first weekend home from the hospital. Boy am I wrong -second, it's the second weekend we've been home. Sunday was the first day Brand had been home with me the whole day since the weened after Hazel was born, and boy did I thoroughly enjoy every minute of it.  I could totally use another day with Brand here.

This weekend we ventured outside for the first time in two weeks -I'm such a paranoid parent still no public places though.  We went to Brand's school and had a picnic and then yesterday we went on a walk around the neighborhood, found some shade and had a picnic too! Hazel sure seemed to be confused with the fresh air at first -there was a bit of a breeze, but once we put her blanket around her and held her close she was all about it -this girl loves to be snuggled. We sat around and enjoyed the cool weather -in the shade that is- had some snacks and played a little Andrea Bocelli - Hazel really seems to like music, especially these classical sorts of singers. 
I can't stop taking pictures of this girl, of her cute outfits, of her silly faces, she sure has me wrapped around her finger! I also can't stop staring at her, I don't want to miss any of her moments!

Man I sure needed this weekend, sometimes I wish every day of the week could be Sunday., It all just seems more fun with him around. Good thing his break is coming up soon!

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Friday, February 06, 2015

A Birth Story

We arrived at the hospital on January 21st around 9:55 pm after having a fun/busy night getting last minute groceries and playing rock band with friends. As we walked up to the emergency room entrance (the main entrance was closed) I thought, this is it -when I leave this place I'm going to be leaving with a baby. Brand and I looked at each other and I'm pretty sure we felt the same thing, here we go.

We got up to labor and delivery and were introduced to our nurse -she was heaven sent and I know it for a fact.  She introduced herself with the bubbliest personality and after she did the word yay! escaped from my mouth.  She showed us to our room, I changed into my hospital gown, and we started the sign in process -you know, the can I have your ID, insurance card, what's your height, how much did you weigh before you were pregnant, yadda-yadda. It wasn't till about midnight when the whole induction started. 

I was still only dilated to a one and not very thinned out so I had quite a ways to go. The nurse gave me medication to help me progress and cause contractions. Sure enough it did, my contractions became more mild, but really I couldn't feel them one bit. The night was pretty slow, I didn't sleep because of all the anticipation of this little girl's arrival. By morning I was dilated to a 3 and my doctor came in to break my water. 

7:30 am January 22nd -water broken.  Holy cow can I tell you how crazy/awkward/weird that whole thing felt. I felt like I had just wet my pants a hundred times over. After my doctor broke my water the contractions started getting more strong. I was able to muscle through them for almost two hours when I finally requested an epidural. What they say is true, request an epidural before you think you will need it, especially if there are a lot of other women in labor, everyone will want an epidural at the same time! My anesthesiologist was just going into a c-section when I requested mine and it took almost an hour for me to get the epidural. I cannot begin to tell you how painful it started to become, it was one of those things where I didn't know if I would be able to make it through if he didn't get there soon. I didn't know how women give birth naturally -more power to you guys! 

After I got my epidural -my anesthesiologist was amazing by the way- I realized that I could still feel the right side of my leg/body.  My nurse didn't believe me and told me that it would take a while for the epidural to work. My thoughts: well then why can I not feel the left side, but I can feel the right? So I waited, in lots of pain, crying pain actually, Brand went to get the nurse because this wasn't just pressure and the epidural really wasn't working on my right side. The anesthesiologist came back in, tested my legs to see what I could feel, and then decided to give me lidocaine. The wonderful medicine worked like a charm and in minutes the pain was gone! 

One o'clock came around, I was dilated to an 8 and they put me on the peanut ball.  From there on it was more waiting and more doses of lidocaine, because it seemed to wear off pretty fast.  The afternoon flew by and we were able to take a bit of a cat nap before her big debut. There was about an hour in the afternoon where I wore a breathing mask to wake the little girl up because she seemed to be napping and they wanted her to be awake. Around 4:50 my nurse came in to let me know that it was time to push, and so I did. Then my doctor came in when it was really time to push, 

10 contractions or less, and pushing 3-4 time with each and there she was. 5:19 pm our little Hazel Anne joined our family. You guys, I was in heaven and I'm pretty sure I went right into mom mode. I cannot tell you how wonderful a day it was. I remember seeing Brand with her for the first time and my heart grew three sizes, it was something I will never forget. Just the way he looked at her, you could see the love pouring out. 
After Brand and I spent about an hour with our little Hazel, getting to know her and starting the whole nursing thing -which she did like a champ- Brand and her headed to the nursery where she got a little bath and some time under the heat lamp. Brand said she loved the heat lamp and stretched out her little legs and arms like it was nothing new to her.

While they were in the nursery I was waiting to be checked out by the nurse. Can I tell you I waited an hour and a half for my day nurse to help me, I just sat there on the delivery bed, medication wearing off and all... Little did I know she was going to just leave me there until her shift was over. Let me just tell you, I was really upset about that. But anyways, my night nurse -the one I loved- had just started her shift and came right in and got me all fixed up, she got me a yummy cranberry sprite drink and wheeled me to my new room, Brand found me and came along and Hazel followed close behind.

The whole thing was better than I imagined and labor seemed to go by really fast. I'm so grateful to have a healthy happy baby on my hands, she is so calm and sweet. I'm so excited for this motherhood thing.

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Thursday, February 05, 2015

two weeks old

Top: JVClothingForKids, leggings: Kohls, socks: me, turban: babyseamss

Each week that goes by makes me sad because that means my little baby is growing up. The time sure has gone by so quickly, I can't remember what life was like without our little Hazel. All I can imagine was that I had a lot of random time on my hands. 

This week Hazel has grown so much and really seems to be getting stronger each day.
 
Hazel makes the funniest noises when she is trying to fall asleep.

She smiles when you talk nice to her. 

She still smiles and laughs in her sleep - some of my favorite moments and that belly laugh, oh my goodness. 

She loves to stare at the fans and lights, sometimes she gets a really concerned look on her face and sometimes she just stares. 

This week we went outside for the first time - we had a walk around the neighborhood and a walk around dad's school.

I love this little girl with all my heart, she sure is the sweetest little girl. 

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