Thursday, October 31, 2013

The Lords Will

I'm not a very open person. In fact, I kind of like to keep my personal life hidden behind so many other things that have gone on in my life, the good and the bad.  I've been wondering how long I can wait to share some of these huuuuge parts of my life with you and I think I'm diving in.

Every year around this time I find my self more in tune with Heavenly Father and the Holy Ghost. And I know the reason why. Seven--I can't believe it seven--years ago today a very special person left this earth. He was perfect and led a great example (even though he was not even five months old yet).  I am so grateful for the knowledge we have about eternal families, and life after death.  To know that life does not end here is such a beautiful thing.

So, the kiddos I used to watch have a baby brother who had Downs Syndrome, I don't use had lightly.  This baby brother was oh so special to me, I knew from the very first moment I got to hold him that he would be such a great example to me and so many others, --yet I didn't know how.  He was my little boyfriend and I spent my friday nights with him talking to him and enjoying his smiling face--and those coos, oh those coos, just the way babies do. I will never forget holding him in my lap and him falling asleep.  One of the easiest angels to take care of and love I tell you.

This baby boy's life was cut short, we don't know why or how, but he passed away.  It took me a few years to write down what happened that day, I don't know if it was because I was scared and didn't want to relive it, and I'm not sure I will ever forget that night, the things that happened and the feelings I remember feeling.  It's the night my testimony of prayer, hope, love, and eternal life shot through the roof and strengthened times infinity.

Here are the events that took place that night, written by my 21 year old self, names have been changed: 

It was a Tuesday night October 31, 2006. I was over at L and S's watching the twinnies, S had taken baby C to the hospital because he had a bad tummy (I believe... see I am already forgetting). The twinnies and I were having fun dancing around the room and playing with toys just like a typical day- when the home phone started to ring. The caller ID said PCH Hospital (the hospital baby C was at) and right then I knew what was going on. The lady asked if my mom was home and I told her no but that I could give her S's cell phone number. After the phone call I went and called my mom to tell her what happened because the hospital was going to call S so I couldn't call her. As soon as I hung up the phone with my mom I went into the other room and said a prayer that baby C would live, be okay and be able to come home and see us. I started crying and the twinnies were very confused so I knew I had to stop because it wouldn't be good for them.

As the night crept along baby C got worse. I remember getting updates from my dad (because he had gone down to the hospital to give baby C a baby blessing). My mom came over to help me get the twinnies ready for Halloween and I think we both knew it wasn't going to turn out good. I don't remember who called or how we found out baby C died but I remember feeling so helpless and frustrated because I had prayed to Heavenly Father and I wanted baby C to come home! My mom and I took the twinnies trick-or-treating and we told some close neighbors and some church members what had gone on, each one of them asked us "How are you so calm?"

L, S and my Dad came home from the hospital after baby C passed away and to this day I can still picture them walking in the front door with his car-seat... empty. That was the moment I knew it was for real and will remember forever. We went home and I don't even remember how I slept or even woke up for school the next day. But I do remember saying our morning family prayer and we couldn't even get through them without sobbing. Throughout the day at school ( I was 18 and in high school) I had people come up to me and ask me why/how I was there.

Thinking back on that night I know that it was Heavenly Father's Will for baby C to leave his life here on earth. And I know I made it through this time with Heavenly Father by my side. I know that baby C is in Heaven with Heavenly Father and is helping Him with his work. I know that if we are faithful and repent of our sins we will return and live with Heavenly Father and get to see our loved ones again. Baby c's example is ever present, and has strengthened my testimony of the Church. 

Each day I am strengthened by the examples of those around me, and it's amazing to me that such a small littler person can have such a huge impact on my life. I'm so grateful for baby C and his mom and dad who let me be his big sissy for his short life here on earth.  It is wonderful to me.


Sunday, October 27, 2013

weekend shenanigans

This weekend was a heaven send. Thursday was a rather large and important day for me, I had a midterm and a presentation to do, and of course I had one of my massive migraines on Thursday instead of Friday.

You can bet Wednesday night I was up will midnight finishing my presentation and stressing about my midterm, it was a night from hades. But of course when it all came to an end I was completely relaxed and distressed, except for the fact that I still had a massive migraine and wasn't headed home.

Friday and Saturday were spent taking care of my self.  I crocheted till my heart was content... well I crocheted a little bit, if my heart was content I would have crochet literally all weekend. I also volunteered at AHS and walked the doggies, this is another one of my happy places.  Who wouldn't want to help homeless animals? I mean, they don't talk back to you, they give you kisses and they are excited to see you even though they don't know you. Sometimes I think animals know more about us than we think, and know more about this whole afterlife, but maybe I'm crazy.  And seriously though, that selfie down there... isn't she just a doll? 

Friday Brand and I also did one of our kind-of-weekly traditions and we went to lunch together.  I love just spending time with him, just the two of us. It's fun, and it's one of those things that I used to take for granted, but now being in school and being busy really puts everything in a different perspective. 
I thought I should also include this lovely picture.  In Arizona we decorate our cacti with lights.  Some of you might find this funny or rather dangerous, but there is nothing more true then seeing a cactus covered with lights and knowing, that you live in Arizona. *Cheers to light-covered-cacti.

linking up: weekend shenanigans


Wednesday, October 23, 2013

what I wore: my mom is a fashionista

cardigan: jcpenny (similar, similar), top: jcpenny (similar), skirt: walmart (similar), heels: macy's (wanting similar), watch: no longer sold (similar), necklaces: russia and grandma (similar, similar), earrings: c.wonder (similar)

It's Wednesday my friends. I think Wednesdays are the days where I feel oh-so-close to the weekend that I'm like that alien looking emoji that has his hands on his face and is pushing in his cheeks saying oohhh-myyy-goooosh. Yeah, you know him.  Wednesdays and Thursdays are my gotta-get-through-this days where I'm staring at the clock waiting for it to say closing time. But when I keep busy it's the sweetest thing.

So I've got to say that almost this entire outfit was my mom's (the tops) or she picked it out for me (skirt and heels). Not even kidding.  My mom has some of the best style out there.  I keep asking her to do a fashion blog and she keeps denying me.  But for now I'll just wear her clothes when she is done with them. Score.

Happy Wednesday dear friends!

What's your favorite part about Wednesday?!

linking up: style elixir, the mrs. & the momma, monday must haves, my style monday, monday bloom, funday mondayCasual FridayThe Pleated PoppyRolled Up PrettyWatch What I'm Wearing  Sunday StyleLiving in Color.


Tuesday, October 22, 2013

how to keep your relationship strong: when someone's in school

 ^^ last year's Holiday photos

Those of you supporting your husband while he is in graduate school or any school for that matter give yourself a round of applause.  It's not always flowers and green flowing meadows when your significant other is in school full time. There are days where you don't get to see them very often, if at all, and there are times when you are both at home and you feel bad watching your favorite show without him because he is in the other room studying, well for me at least.  

Since Brand stated his masters program I developed some new traditions--if you will--that help us stay close together and continue to build our relationship.  

1. Eat dinner without distractions -- This can be one of the toughest things to do, but it is so worth it.  Dinner does not have to be a grandiose event, in fact some of our dinners are about 15 minutes long.  But it allows the pair of you to sit down and talk about what happened that day. If he's quite that might mean he has a lot on his mind.  Ask him about any up coming tests, what he is most worried about.  See if there is anything you can do to help him.  I've found that talking things out is one of the best ways to de-stress.  It's helpful to have someone there to vent to or just to talk about the things you are are worried about. 
For those of you with kids I'm sure it can be difficult. But try.  Try and involve your kids in the conversation too, invite them to tell about their day, I'm sure your husband would love to hear from them too.  

2. Get dressed -- Okay, I know this sounds super simple. Don't just get dressed to go out for the day, get dressed because you know he's coming home.  Don't just get dressed because you want him to take your blog pictures--I am guilty of this sometimes--get dressed for him. The fun parts are when he says "what are you all dressed up for?" to which you can reply "oh, you told me you were coming home and I wanted to look good for you." ooooor something of that nature. 

3. Plan a weekly date night -- He's in classes all week long, studies all the time, and I'm sure would appreciate a break.  Also, it's extremely necessary for the two of you to spend time outside the house together.  It creates memories and also gives the mind a moment to take a break from all the studying. 

4. Leave special notes -- Does he have an Ipad or some kind of note device?  Write him a note somewhere he will see it.  He doesn't have a note device you say? Try the "old fashion way" write him a note and put it in his backpack or shoe, somewhere that he will find it.  It's amazing how much a positive note, sweet comment or little "i love you!" can do for him. 

5. Keep communication open -- Getting a copy of his class and meeting schedules might be one of the first things to do when he starts school. It's important to know each other's schedules, that way you don't interrupt him during class or a test, be considerate. Check in with each other throughout the day, it doesn't need to be every hour on the hour--we aren't trying to be stalkers ladies--but just stay in touch.  This might sound a little creepy, but Brand and I have an app called Life360.  It's basically a tracking device that allows you to tell the people in your "group" (in our case each other) that you are "checking in" at a specific location.  Mine tells me when Brand gets to school and when he is headed home, or leaves school.  It's easier then having him to remember to text me when he gets there. The app has other pros, but this is one of the parts I like. 

Now, these aren't the only things you can do to keep your relationship strong, but they are some of the ones we've been using and they work!  Good luck to you! And good luck with school! 

and don't forget to enter the giveaway


Monday, October 21, 2013

Eternal Girl Giveaway


This week I'm happy to announce that I'm teaming up with Julia from Eternal Girl
Julia is the master and creater behind the jewlery at Eternal Girl and really has a creative brain.

If there is one thing I look for when I shop for jewlery its versatility.
You know, the trusty necklace that goes with just about anything in your closet so you wear it almost daily?
It's the perfect kind of jewlery to have. 
Eternal Girl jewlery has that kind of jewlery.

Today Julia is offering one of my lucky friends (YOU!) a $10 credit to her Eternal Girl Etsy shop. 
Take a look around at Eternal Girl and see what you could buy. 
She has handmade necklaces, earrings, rings, and greeting cards. 
Take a look around, enjoy and enter the giveaway!! 

a Rafflecopter giveaway


Tuesday, October 15, 2013

when you're in the depths of despair

top: jcpenny (similar), cardi: thrifted (orig. jcrew), pants: tjmaxx (similar), boots: famous footwear (similar), boot cuffs: c/o Alyssa Dawson Design
(and the pictures are not in focus, so I apologize)

Sometimes I think I'm over dramatic like Anne.  After all, my middle name is Anne -yes with an "e" my mother is a sophisticated woman no doubt. But sometimes I feel like I'm in the depths of despair, mine is a little different because I'm not an orphan, that poor Anne girl.  When I'm in the depths of despair I tend to find a way to make it worse.  Say for instance I'm upset about the way I look because I'm not taller or because I have over-sized hips. -See, here goes my middle name again.  So I go looking at pictures of bloggers that I obsess over because I love the way the wear their clothes or because I love the life they have.  Can I be any more materialistic?!  It's like a vicious cycle and I just dig myself deeper and deeper into despair. 

What's up with that??

Anyways, it seems when I have these kinds of moments it helps me to remember who I really am and all the good things that I have and have become. Because if there is one thing I've learned through my 24 years of life it's that comparing your self to others gets you no where, you've just gotta be yourself.  

So, I'm being my self today. 

Another way to get out of the depths of despair is to watch a funny show, for me its the office.  I wonder what Anne would think about the office? 

Happy Wednesday Eve!

linking up: Casual FridayThe Pleated PoppyRolled Up Pretty,, Watch What I'm Wearing  Sunday Style, Living in Color.


that's what I'm talkin about


With the fall and winter season upon us I get really excited. 
I love the Arizona winter. 
It's not too cold, but cold enough to have to bundle up. 
When I think of the winter season I think about dressing warm. 
When I think about dressing warm I think about big chunky scarves, leg warmers and blankets. 
Thinking about them makes me want to make them. 
Here are some chunkys that are necessary for a warm winter. 
Super chunky scarf
This girl takes some of the most random pictures, but her chunky scarves are amazing. 
Needing me a pair of boot cuffs.
I can picture myself on this couch with this chunky blanket
And the color in this one?! Wow. 

What do you like most about winter? 

Monday, October 14, 2013

weekend shenanigans

This weekend was definitely the weekend that brought fall to Arizona. There was a nice crisp breeze during the day, and when you stood in the sun it felt oh-so-right.

In our neighborhood it was garage sale weekend.  I was so excited because I remember when I was a kid how huge garage sales were. Almost every other house used to sell/give away their junk, and it all seemed like one really big party.  Well, in case you didn't know, times have changed and now there is only one garage sale for every twelve houses, or so.  I was pretty bummed out. The night before I dreamt about walking through the neighborhoods looking at people's old things, enjoying the weather and just spending some time outside with Brand. After reality hit and we started driving through the neighborhoods to "window shop" I had about enough, this wasn't what I had planned.  So, we headed to Brand's parents to take their doggies for a walk and look at the garage sales in their neighborhood.

And let me say walking was so much more fun.  We stopped at the places that looked the most interesting and found some really awesome deals, but didn't buy any of course.  Just picture this really smart dark emrald green leather chair with gold pinching and dark cherry wood arms and legs.  It was something out of an office design catalog. I tried to picture it in our apartment, but couldn't find a spot for it.

This weekend Brand studied at school and I brought him dinner.  I was driving home from "work" and stopped on by the panda express for some to-go orange chicken.  We ate in one of his classrooms and boy did I feel like a rebel without a cause.  Brand has been studying oh-so-much lately, which again I'm not complaining, I'm so impressed with his ambition to learn and succeed.

I also accomplished a lot of crocheting this weekend.  I'm off school and "work" a couple days this week so I didn't really have much homework to prepare.  I created "hoot" the owl, half of his body is pictured above and he will be placed in my etsy shop soon, and I'm also trying to quickly finish this tunisian black and white (my second afghan that I'm making for Brand and I, one that will be used more often though).

linking up: weekend shenanigans

Friday, October 11, 2013

my week in pictures

Let me tell you about Bell{e}. She is a one-of-a-kind, warm hearted, loving, girl who longs for affection. Every week at AHS I fall in love with a few animals and watch on the website to make sure they get adopted. Its like my mission of sorts. My favorite part about Bell{e} is that if you stop petting her she will nose bonk your hand to get you to keep going. She got adopted this week, so all is well in the world. 

It seems as though those cold or warm, whatever the weather demands, metal benches are my lot-in-life, figuratively and literally.  I find myself there way too often to wait for the school shuttle to pick me up and take me to school. I would not be surprised if I started developing a irrational hate relationship between those benches.

I've found my self sitting at this exact computer bench every night for the past two weeks. (Don't mind the wires, I'm only human).  It would be a better story say if I was having fun or getting creative on this computer, however it's all about homework.  But, wallowing in self pity is not attractive.

This week seemed to have flown by.  The weather is starting to get so nice here! I can't believe how beautiful it was outside today. The smell of that fresh air in my apartment really tickles me. Its oh so crisp and cool.

Happy Friday Friends! I hope the weekend finds you well!

monday: a picture to describe your weekend
tuesday: that's what I'm talkin about
wednesday: awkward and awesome

Linking up: with high five for friday

Wednesday, October 09, 2013

awkward and awesome

 Top: downeast basics, cardi: jcpenny, jeans: nordstrom, sandals: famous footwear(I think?), watch: no longer selling, earrings: walmart

When it's windy outside, you have your backpack on, and something keeps hitting your bum.  You look behind you to see if someone is playing a trick on you and realize that the cuplrate is your backpack straps. 
For a second there I thought it was possible that someone was actually hitting my bum. 

When someone steals your seat and then you have to steal someone elses because there aren't any open seats in the class.

Getting ready to take a test, the papers are being handed out and someone's phone goes off and the ring tone is "let the bodies hit the floor".  Kind of fitting. 

Buttcracks.  It doesn't matter where you see them. Well, except if they are on a baby. 

I'm late for the bus and there is standing room only except for the one seat that has a girls backpack on it.  I ask her if I can "sit there" she responds by giving me the biggest stink eye moves her bag with a sigh, and then moves her legs gesturing me to CLIMB over her.  I'm sorry, I didn't realize your BACKPACK was so important! 

When you accidentally make someone think you go to whiskey row for the alcohol. And it's too late to recover so you change the subject. 
The person next to you on the bus giving up their seat so an elderly woman doesn't have to walk all the way to the back of the bus to find a seat. 

The season permier of the mindy project. Seriously, such a funny show! 

Having your bus driver call you little sister, long story short he's Native American and I'm 1/16 Chippewa.

The weather cooling down. But I don't think many of you understand... this is awwwesome

Happy Thursday lovely friends!


Tuesday, October 08, 2013

that's what I'm talkin about


This weekend I had one of those shut-up moments! 
Not like shut-up and be quiet, but
Exciting wise!
So I was googling and found this seriously awesome etsy shop
They crochet handmade mini dogs. 
Obviously I want this one, because that's almost exactly what my dog looked like! 
I know right?! 
Okay, so let me show you what else I found this weekend.
A carrot cake recipe that looks heavenly
This girls new skirts, it looks so twirl worthy. 
Not to toot my own horn, but I've been making this on the regular. So easy and yummy
One tip, don't use too much salsa. 
Oh and this sweater, this one, this one (I mean any color, really) and this over sized cardigan.  
Where's the $100 gift card I'm supposed to find in my pocket?


Monday, October 07, 2013

a picture to describe your weekend

This picture describes my weekend almost entirely. 

1. I did so much school work that I think my bum got numb at least twice. I strongly dislike sitting down for long periods of time, but sometimes it's necessary, especially when your teachers give you lots of homework.
2. Although this picture looks chaotic, it wasn't, there was a purpose for many of these chairs. And there was order to my weekend. Friday night we were supposed to feed the missionaries, they called up sick. Saturday morning I volunteered at AHS, Saturday afternoon Brand and I studied in this room for a good 3 and a half hours. Well, he studied and I did homework. And then school closed and we went home and did homework.  I'm pretty sure I was up till alllllmost midnight doing homework and he was up till 330am studying. But, no complains here. 
3. I enjoyed my Sunday crocheting a puppy, for my nephew's first birthday, watching conference, and being with family. 

Moral of the story: Sometimes you have to live through the boring stuff in order to taste the good stuff. And such was my weekend. 



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